Twighlight Zone Experiences

[Danny G]

I can't afford a nasty divorce!

I can tell you from experience that the nastier they are the more they cost.
I can also tell you that sometimes they're worth every penny

[The Lone Harper]

I can't afford a nasty divorce!

I can tell you from experience that the nastier they are the more they cost.
I can also tell you that sometimes they're worth every penny

I've heard some people say that marriage is a fine institution, I just can't figure out who would want to spend their life in an institution?

[Age]

I can't afford a nasty divorce!

I can tell you from experience that the nastier they are the more they cost.
I can also tell you that sometimes they're worth every penny

My brother gave his first wife 200 bucks more per month than her lawyer asked for. When the judge asked why he wanted to give the extra money he said it was worth it to get rid of her.

[beads]

Marriage is grand. Divorce is 200 grand. 

[smojoe]

So one night I couldn't sleep. Got up and sat on the couch in the dark. Cass came in and asked what was wrong. I told her I was remembering 1966 when we were dating and her dad caught up in the back seat of her car (p.s. I couldn't afford a car). So..aaanyway he shoves a shotgun in my face and sez: "You either marry my daughter or I'll see to it that you get 20 years in prison".
So Cass asked why I was crying. I told her: "I would have been released from in 1986". People can visit me at Sarasota memorial hospt. Room 95.

Next stop Willoughby.

[Age]

ROTFLMBO!

[John Broecker]

Another T-Zone experience:

When our mother passed away,
my older brother said that his
wristwatch stopped. My watch
stopped, too.

Another:

My older brother passed away on
11.11.11. I wasn't wearing a watch.

And another:

I had an excellent Timex self-winding
watch. My drummer's wrists wound it
too much, and it died.

Best Regards, Keep Ticking

JB

[Age]

The day Barbara's mom passed away (at 101) a bald eagle was sitting on a branch just outside her window, and didn't fly away when I came to the window to look at it; it just looked back at me. After a few minutes, when I looked again, it was gone. Even stranger, while we have a few bald eagles flying around nowadays, we didn't have any at all back then.

[beads]

When my father in law was buried, a bald eagle circled over the small, rural cemetery. This cemetery is many miles from any body of water larger than a pond. We had never seen an eagle anywhere near there, and we have never seen one in that area since.

[Age]

Yeah, Gotta watch them eagles; who knew they could get that spooky? 😬

[Danny G]

Linette came in the house and asked if I bought her a pig.
He was rooting around in the firepit.
I called the cops and squeeled on it.
If nobody claims it he might end up in the smoker and next to the mashed taters

[Age]

Looks ugly as snot, yet somehow, strangely delicious. 

[Danny G]

The police came out and looked at the pig and took his picture..
Nobody reported a missing pig.
Wonder if they'll put his picture on a milk carton?
Got up this morning and looked around for the pig.
Hope he found his way home.

[Age]

Too bad! I was thinking of comin' over for lunch.

[brorat]

Oinker Alert!!!